Well, I have more to report than what went on tonight. For one thing, I've absolutely not been going to the gym. I think it's just too far. However, the university I go to has a decent gym, certainly good enough for my needs, and I intend to start going there on a regular basis. I'm going to pick up my stuff from the LifeCenter gym tomorrow and I've told my Dad to pull my membership there. It did me no good, though... I can't really blame it. I didn't put it to any use.
I'm trying to schedule things. It's not just about eating and exercising. That sounds great, of course, but just saying that I'm going to do that does me little good. As well, starting to do it is nice and all, but after a while things peter off. Exercising especially. I've managed to change my diet for the better, make things stick. The diet soda thing, for example.
But I believe in order to make things work for me, I need a schedule. I need to change my life. A schedule starts that kind of change. Unfortunately, there are a lot of changes I want to make. For example, I have it in my mind that I need to start standing more than I sit. (I sit all the time) I want to spend most of my time standing. Is that possible? I'm not really sure. I'm starting school soon and I'm sure my professors won't appreciate me standing up in class.
I think scheduling will work better. Something else that I am instituting, already in progress is going to the beach once a week. Doing this allows me to exercise quite a bit. Not so much on the beach, but in the ocean. I can walk and walk and walk, it's more like running or jogging really. I don't need to break for a long time. I think what I want to do is go to the northern tip of Ocean City and start water walking around to the Ocean side, and continue to water walk my way down the island. Then, when I do get tired, take a break, and then water walk my way back up. If I don't get tired, I can just start walking back up when I reach the midpoint of the day.
I won't be able to swim though. I tore my bicep in my right arm. That's painful! Just another sign of what a pitiful wretch I am. The good news is that it isn't bad. Normally, it's pretty bad, but I'm bouncing back quickly. There was no swelling or bruising and I have most use of my arm back. There is still pain and I am a little limited (like no swimming) but I'm sure things will improve with time, and until then I can still exercise.
I want to schedule in 30 minutes of exercise a day, at the gym or not. This means Saturday and Sunday too. Whether I'll go to the gym then or not, I don't know.
Another thing I've been doing is making it to Weight Watchers every week. This week marked a month. And more importantly, this week, unlike the other weeks, I actually lost weight. I lost 9.2 lbs. I now weigh 523.4 lbs. (As you can see, comparing to previous entries, I had gained some weight back)
I've also been going to an addiction recovery meeting every week at my church. They use a variation of the twelve step program designed for mormons. So, I've been there every week for a month now as well. The two people are running it are married, they are a older missionary couple, and pretty nice at that. There was a confrontation with them last week. One of their biggest things is that they do not judge anyone in the meeting. The insist there is no judgement, no matter is said or anything.
Of course, that's not really possible, but I get the point. Anyway, I get a call from the Elder one morning and we talked for a minute, and he said that he wanted to talk about the previous week. This call took place on the morning of the day that the meeting takes place. The previous week I had a bunch of things going on that day, and I'd sat through a Weight Watcher's meeting (I usually do that on a different day, but there had been complication, as will happen) and because I was hungry I'd opened a bag of cheese curls during the meeting (Weight Watcher's makes them). This is nothing new. People are welcome to eat at the Weight Watcher's meetings, though I imagine they wouldn't want you to bring in a piece of pizza from next door. But eating their products, or even a healthy food like a vegetable or fruit, would be fine. And it was. But I didn't gobble it down. I'm trying not to do that. I ate through the packet slowly. It was a one serving pouch that is worth two points on the Weight Watcher's points system.
Well, when the meeting was over, I still wasn't done with the cheese curls. So I took them with me to the next meeting, at church, which is right down the road from Weight Watchers. I got into the meeting, and I ate the rest of the bag. Nobody seemed to pay any mind, which I expected. I hadn't even really thought about it.
But here I am on the phone with the Elder and he wants to talk about the previous week. I don't even know why. I hadn't really said anything, and maybe that's what he wanted to talk about. But no, he was concerned about me bringing food into the meeting because my addiction is overeating. He told me, verbatim: "that's like an alcoholic bring a beer to the meeting".
Naturally, I had to disagree with this. I assumed, and I would think some would agree with me, that this was simply a misunderstanding, a situation taken out of context. After all, the pouch the cheese curls were in was a silver pouch with no plainly visible words on it. To the average observer, it would just be apparent I was eating some kind of cheese curl. So I tried to explain that this was a Weight Watcher's snack, made specifically for the people following that plan. I was told that doesn't matter, it's still the same thing. I disagreed. For one thing, an alcoholic does not need to imbibe alcohol, nor does anyone ever need to do so. Any person can go through their entire life with a drop of the stuff and they will have no problems as a result. You don't need it to live.
And I was hungry. I tried to explain, but that didn't matter. It was still the same, and furthermore, it was a distraction. I didn't agree with him there either, but being the diplomat that I am, I saw an opportunity, and agreed not to bring food in anymore on account of the fact that it distracts people. We said our goodbye and hung up.
Moments later I called back. It had just hit me. What's all this horseshit about not judging people about??? That's exactly what he just did. Oh sure, I can understand why. All he saw was a fat guy who admits to having a problem, and there he is indulging said problem! But I explained the misunderstanding. And in any case, how hard would it have been to ask about that food? What exactly was I eating? Oh, it was a weight watcher's food? Well, maybe I should mind my own goddamn business then and not go judging you.
But no, I laid it out for him, and he still insisted that I was like a drunk bringing a drink. So I called back, and I restated that because he finds it distracting, I would keep my promise not to bring food in, and that I would be there that night, but that I felt that I need him to keep up his end of the bargain and to "practice what you preach". I reminded him how strong a point he and his wife had made about being judgemental, and I accused him of hypocrisy. He assured me that he was not being judgemental and to back up his point (poorly, I might add) he told me that he had contacted his superiors in the program to discuss this and ask how to go about handling it, and they had told him to do exactly what he did.
Well, honestly, if he hadn't thought that he was perhaps judging me, would he have even thought about asking for guidance from a superior? If he hadn't judged me, what then would have to ask about? I reiterated that his judgement was wrong because this snack had been produced by Weight Watcher's and was a part of the plan. This was a part of the solution. A beer is never part of the solution for an alcoholic. He was adamant, he had not judged and I was wrong for bringing any kind of food to the meeting.
I gave him a few choice words and told him that if he didn't have the good sense God gave him to see the difference, that there was no point in talking further. There are intelligent people to talk to, after all. I hung up on him midsentence.
Being full of indignance, I got dressed and sought vindication. I started with my mother. My sister was there as well, but I wasn't looking to her for support. I told my mother about the situation. She agreed with the Elder. Why was I bringing food to a meeting when I'm trying to stop eating. You know...anyone that would try to stop eating...*sigh* So, I figured to hell with it. I couldn't believe my own Mother...just fucking wow.
So the day went on and I got ready to leave for the meeting. On the way out Dad and I were talking, and for some God forsaken reason, I ended up telling him, or starting to tell him the story, starting with the backstory about how I ended up bringing the snack in. I never got to bringing it in. He was shocked that I would eat something BEFORE going to that meeting, let alone during it. I pointed out again, this is a weight watcher snack, didn't matter. Why I was surprised, I don't know. My Dad's got about as much goddamned sense as a fucking rock, especially when it comes to other people. If someone had given him shit instead of me, he would have understood perfectly, he would have been right, even if he was wrong.
I ended the conversation, telling him essentially the same thing I told the Elder, if you don't have the sense to recognize the difference...Then he said "sounds like it's you who doesn't see the difference!" Really. This is why I shouldn't have been upset. His best comeback was something to expect out of a 3rd grader. "No, I don't stink! You do! You! You!"
Then, he started talking about how he was going to retire soon and how he would be selling the house and moving somewhere without extra bedrooms, and I wouldn't be coming. Seriously, what the fuck is that? I don't even know why he would bring that up then. The only thing I can figure was he was trying to pick something he could say that would hurt me, and that was the best he could come up with? I don't know. Maybe it was the most hurtful thing he could say without really fucking things up between us. I was more than a little baffled.
At the time Mom was making BLT's, with real bacon, which we never have around the house, and I don't know why she was using it then. But I figured a few BLT's couldn't hurt. She asked if I wanted one or...I responded by saying "No, I'll be damned if I eat EVEN one!" and stormed out of the house, acutely aware that no matter how lightly I tried to tread, it sounded very much like I was stomping my feet. That's embarrassing.
So I went to the meeting, and was met by the shock that registered on the Elder's face. He was sure I wouldn't be coming. I wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of not showing up. Besides, I felt like this meeting could really help me, and what good would I be doing buy not going anymore? It would cause problems at home, and it would do me no good in general. Better that I go. The disbelief on his face vindicated more than I could really have hoped for. This week he all but apologized. Twice I thought he was going to, but he couldn't really seem to bring himself to do it. Guess apologizing isn't one his strong suits. Turns out he's a former cop, so that's not such a big surprise, really.
As for tonight, well, I went to my addiction meeting, and then afterward I went to karaoke, like I do every other week. My friend and his gf were there. We had a good time, I got to sing four songs, which I haven't done there in a long time, because the MC doesn't like to do his job right. I guess maybe enough people bitched about it. We'll see next week.
We had a new waitress tonight. Maybe she's been there before, I don't know for sure. But it was the first time I saw her, or not, maybe I'd seen her before but didn't really notice, I don't know, I can be oblivious.
She was the younger sister of one of the bartenders, so they called her Junior. That's what we'll call her now. It was on her name tag after all. She was attractive, but I didn't pay much mind. There is another girl that goes, she's kind of a hick girl, but I like that. No perfect body, she has some flab, but it looks good on her, I think. She moves very well. She has flab but she's not a fat girl. She wears a camo cap, jeans and a shirt that doesn't go all the way down. She has a deer head tattooed on her back. She carried a can of dip in her back pocket. I don't mean French Onion. I mean SKOAL!!! I think I might dedicate a Cledus T Judd song for her one week. I wonder if they have Skoal! (to the tune of the Grundy County Auction). Anyway, this girl is nice, but she does have a boyfriend. And she's friendly ok, but she doesn't seem overly interested in me. I buy her a drink from time to time and she appreciates it. Mostly we exchange nods, and sometimes she comes and sits down with me for a few minutes. Maybe we talk, if there's something to talk about.
Anyway, I decided tonight I was going to tell her I'm attracted to her. I mean, I buy her drinks, that's pretty much a sign of that. She's gotta know I'm checking her out. I don't think it will come as a surprise. But I never got around to that. But I became more and more interested in my waitress as the night grew. It started with flattery. She asked me to sing a song. Well, first she asked if I was singing again, after I had just sung one. She told me she loves it when I sing. She asked what I was singing and I told her she could choose from the two songs I had already written out. I had written out a Guns and Roses song and a Adam Sandler song. She wasn't really interested in either of them. She wanted something country, like Charlie Daniels. So I told her to pick one. She said Charlie Daniels. I asked which one. I figured she wouldn't really say The Devil Went Down to Georgia. But she did. Ok, I'd have preferred to sing something like "The Fightin Side of Me" or something, but whatever, I put it in. It occurred to me I needed to get her name. I did get her real name, but she explained the Junior thing. When I got called up to sing it, I noticed she was waiting a booth and both of her arms were occupied by the occupants of the booth. I mean two people were grabbing her arms. i slapped one of the hands away from her and told the guy "Hey, no touchin' the moichandise!" I got to the Mike and said "This is dedicated to my waitress, Junior, who's currently being manhandled!"
I sang the song. It wasn't my best. You have to practice that song, it moves fast. But it was well received and she liked it. I mentioned to her that she needs to put a sign on her saying "No touching the goods". She laughed it off and explained that she knew one of the guys and he was ok. The other one was just touching her arm and as long as he didn't touch anything too personal she was fine with letting him get good and drunk so he could tip her well.
I saw nothing wrong with that, but I had to tease her, so I asked where I could touch her. She indicated her back and her side, and that's where I touched her.
I still hadn't ordered anything to eat at this point (I had ordered the endless chips and salsa, I always do) so when she came back and asked if I wanted anything, I said "You". She seemed fine with that too, and we laughed, ha ha ha...I thought she took the sexual harassment pretty well, as did the others at my table.
There was some other action going on, in fact, this was a hell of a night for entertainment. A bunch of suits had shown up, apparently, they do so every three months. (End of quarter celebration?) One of them had a girl with him, they appeared to be together, kissed occasionally. But he kept trying to grab her ass, and every time he got his hand on there, she'd slide it off. We had a good time watching for this, and laughing at his expense. I got the waitress in on it, though she was a little more concerned with what one of the suits was saying/ trying to do with/to her sister. She sat down next to me and we watched him, ready to kick some ass. Never got the chance.
We became more and more friendly. I had ordered by this point. She asked again if there was anything she could get me. I suggested her number. She didn't laugh, just raised her eyebrow at me. The ass grabber managed to get a hand on his girl's ass for a second, then it came off. She pointed out it was an ass brush and not an ass grab. I said "wait, show me how this works again" and pretended to put my hand on her's. Again, some laughter, along with what you might call a rather meaninglful look. I didn't know if I was really doing well or if she was just working for her tip (I really hoped the former, because the latter would make me feel rather scummy) but I was having fun.
She came back later as the night wound down with the check. I asked her if her number was on it. She said she didn't have a cell phone. Said that Sprint had wanted 300 or they were going to turn her phone off and she told them to go for it. She asked me to give her mine though...I've heard that line before. But I gave it to her anyway, and I mentioned facebook. I'm on facebook. Not giving the information out. But she gave me her name and told me to hit her up there and myspace. (Really? People still use myspace? Why??)
I had a little confrontation with another girl at the bar, a little misunderstanding really, though she'd been really bitchy about it. I didn't want any bad blood, as she was friends with some karaoke buddies of mine (including the tobacco chewing hick girl that I was oddly attracted to) so I thought I'd buy her a drink to smooth things over. Apparently, my waitress had witnessed the exchange and was not thrilled about me buying this girl a drink. No she flat out refused to let me. Even threatened to put something nasty in the girl's drink. So I gave up on that, and I offered to by my waitress a drink. She said I couldn't because she wasn't off duty. I asked when she was off duty. She told me 1Am, when the bar shuts down. That wasn't what I meant, I wanted her days off. But I said ok, and invited her to Denny's with us. Turns out she has a kid that she has to go home to. If she was saying that to deter me, it wasn't working. I'm fine with kids. In fact, I'd like to have kids at some point and I know my folks are chomping at the bit to be grandparents, so a girl that already has kids is ok with me.
So I pointed out what I wanted, her days off and she told me. Turns out Tuesday is one of those days and my friends had wanted to try quizzo out which is on Tuesdays. Of course, she wouldn't want to be there on her day off, would she? Turns out that IS where she hangs out when she's not on. Probably gets a discount.
So I asked if I could buy her a drink on Tuesday and play quizzo with her, and she was all for it. Out of concern (that I might just be jerking off, really) I asked if she was involved with someone. She said no, and I showed my relief, stating I don't want to be wooing a married woman. She showed me her hands, and I took advantage of the situation to hold one of them. Tentatively, if you can imagine tentatively holding someone's hand. That's how I held it and she smiled, blushed even, and cosed her hand on mine, and (oh boy is THIS sappy!) held my hand for a few moments, until she needed to get up again.
We talked again for a few minutes and cemented the quizzo date and I left. So what was that? Real flirtation on both parts? Is it possible she finds herself attracted to me? Like i am to her? Even close? Could it be she's looked past my weight and seen what's really there? Or was she doing it for the tip? I don't want to think that. I don't want to think i got played like that, and I think she's worked there for a while. She seemed to know who I was, and I think everyone there knows I'm a good tipper. She really didn't get much more out of me than anyone else would have. Between the three of us, there was a 65 dollar check. I gave her 80. Thats barely more than 20% which is about what I tip.
Was she doing it for a free drink or two on Tuesday? Jesus that would be shallow. Is she doing for regular business, like a fucking stripper? I hope not, because that's worse than my normal fuckups, meeting some girl online and being heartbroken when she sees me in person and realizes what a mistake she's made. I've had women play me for the business and it truly hurts. It's absolutely humiliating.
I hope that's not what I'm looking at.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
Back from Weight Watchers
Not much to report there. They were talking about activity, but mostly making suggestions about what kind of activities we can do in the summer (now). I just love when they suggest using the Wii for exercise. Oh, I know, some people like it, and maybe I'm wrong, but I'm not about to go that route.
I did get my weight. It's gone up. A few weeks ago I went and they had apparently decided they were going "green"! Oh boy. Basically this means they don't want to supply the paper towels anymore. So, either you wear socks on the scale or a pair of sandals. I wear sandals, so that works for me. But my weight went up which was a little confusing at the time. I weighed the sandals and holy cow! Two pounds! Turns out I had lost a little instead.
So, today, no surprises. I'm still wearing the sandals, but I know to expect the extra two pounds. Turns out I had gained again. I wasn't too surprised by that, but the lady weighing me thought to ask if I had eaten or drunk anything before I came in. I had eaten a banana and a bottle and a half of water. Weighing the water, it appears I may not have gained after all, but I'm not putting much faith in that. If it is true, then it will be a nice loss when I go back next week.
But not on Friday. Thursday is out too, because of the addict's meeting and karaoke. Monday may soon be a bad idea as well.
So, I figure Tuesday may be the best idea, an evening meeting, later is probably better than early. And to save on gas, I'll make Tuesday a gym day, so I'll can hit Weight Watcher's on my way back.
I also need to schedule some cigar time at my cigar shop. They have a nice VIP lounge for members, like myself, and being there and smoking cigars helps me to avoid cigarettes. That probably doesn't make a lot of sense to you, but I'm addicted to tobacco and I know it. But weight has to be my first priority. I don't inhale the cigars and I don't like cigarettes. So it works in my favor to smoke the cigars, instead of the cigarettes, which in turn will help my exercise as well, since I won't be inhaling all that smoke.
I did get my weight. It's gone up. A few weeks ago I went and they had apparently decided they were going "green"! Oh boy. Basically this means they don't want to supply the paper towels anymore. So, either you wear socks on the scale or a pair of sandals. I wear sandals, so that works for me. But my weight went up which was a little confusing at the time. I weighed the sandals and holy cow! Two pounds! Turns out I had lost a little instead.
So, today, no surprises. I'm still wearing the sandals, but I know to expect the extra two pounds. Turns out I had gained again. I wasn't too surprised by that, but the lady weighing me thought to ask if I had eaten or drunk anything before I came in. I had eaten a banana and a bottle and a half of water. Weighing the water, it appears I may not have gained after all, but I'm not putting much faith in that. If it is true, then it will be a nice loss when I go back next week.
But not on Friday. Thursday is out too, because of the addict's meeting and karaoke. Monday may soon be a bad idea as well.
So, I figure Tuesday may be the best idea, an evening meeting, later is probably better than early. And to save on gas, I'll make Tuesday a gym day, so I'll can hit Weight Watcher's on my way back.
I also need to schedule some cigar time at my cigar shop. They have a nice VIP lounge for members, like myself, and being there and smoking cigars helps me to avoid cigarettes. That probably doesn't make a lot of sense to you, but I'm addicted to tobacco and I know it. But weight has to be my first priority. I don't inhale the cigars and I don't like cigarettes. So it works in my favor to smoke the cigars, instead of the cigarettes, which in turn will help my exercise as well, since I won't be inhaling all that smoke.
I'm back...again
So why have I seemingly abandoned my blog for most fo the month of July? I guess I haven't done much that's "diety". Got a workout on the fourth of July, finding a spot to set up camp for the concert at Cooper River Park (Foghat and Marshall Tucker Band), then moving to another spot, because everyone else wanted to camp out elsewhere, then moving back to the original spot because we had a canopy and couldn't put it up where they wanted to, and moving again because our spot was too close to some port a potties, and finally setting up in the spot we ended up at.
Since then, I've claimed to go to the gym but haven't. I've made it to karaoke every week without fail, even have some friends going with me now.
My newest development is an addictions recovery program at my church. They understand my addiction is overeating (and under excersizing, I guess) and I'll be there every Thursday before karaoke.
I think part of the problem is a schedule. For one thing, I need to stick to this blog, it can help to keep me honest. I also need to make a schedule, that involves not only karaoke, but weight watchers, the addictions recovery program and the gym. I took my measurement the other day, by the way, I came up with 67 inches. Not sure how that compares to my last measurement, I'll have to go back and look. Don't know what my exact weight is. Going to look at meetings for today and probably go to one.
I'll update on how things are going, and how the plan is working.
Einstein said two things I really like:
1. Life is like a bicycle: In order to maintain balance, you must keep moving.
2. Blind respect for authority is the enemy of truth.
Since then, I've claimed to go to the gym but haven't. I've made it to karaoke every week without fail, even have some friends going with me now.
My newest development is an addictions recovery program at my church. They understand my addiction is overeating (and under excersizing, I guess) and I'll be there every Thursday before karaoke.
I think part of the problem is a schedule. For one thing, I need to stick to this blog, it can help to keep me honest. I also need to make a schedule, that involves not only karaoke, but weight watchers, the addictions recovery program and the gym. I took my measurement the other day, by the way, I came up with 67 inches. Not sure how that compares to my last measurement, I'll have to go back and look. Don't know what my exact weight is. Going to look at meetings for today and probably go to one.
I'll update on how things are going, and how the plan is working.
Einstein said two things I really like:
1. Life is like a bicycle: In order to maintain balance, you must keep moving.
2. Blind respect for authority is the enemy of truth.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
I'''''m Baaaaaaaaack!
Not that anyone's reading.
But in the last post I mentioned that if you don't hear from me for a while, I might just be dead. Thought it would be good to point out I've just been busy.
The day I last posted marked the beginning of a short vacation in which I visited an old friend of mine. I just got back a few days ago. I had planned to post updates along the week that I was gone, but as it turns out, my friend has neither cable or internet. To top it off, my laptop chose that time to stop responding to my power adapter. Thankfully, my buddy's stepdaughter's computer was in the house and her power adapter was compatible with my laptop.
I didn't really get out to the gym much, really just to set up my locker (I am now renting a locker there) and go for a swim.
So there's not been much exercise, but what about the diet? Well, I brought some Weight Watcher's snacks with me for the vacation, so that I wouldn't have to worry about being hungry. Honestly, I didn't need them much. I didn't eat well, but while I was at my friend's I didn't indulge myself too much. Though we did go out to a buffet one evening, even then I didn't stuff myself too much.
However, at the end of my mini-vaca, I stopped at a place I've been dying to try - "Simply Fondue".
They have an extensive Martini selection, and they offer a four course meal starting with a salad, an appetizer that comes with a bowl of melted cheese and sauce, along with vegetables, fruit, and bread to dip in.
Then the main course consists of three meats of your choosing and a plate of vegetables. The fondue grill is used to heat a pot of oil that you cook the food in.
The dessert is peices of fruit, marshmallow and cake. And you can choose from 14 different chocalate sauces to dip the dessert in.
Obviously, this is pretty filling stuff.
Anyway, I don't know how far my weight went up this week yet, as I haven't been to Weight Watcher's, I'm going in a few hours.
I'll take my measurements as well, though I imagine there won't be much difference.
In conclusion, I haven't been to the gym for real in a week. No treadmill, etc. I can't let mysellf drop the exercise regimine. I have to get back on the ball.
Of course, part of the problem is that tomorrow marks the beginning of another mini vacation, this time I'll be spending the weekend plus change with some other friends of mine, for the 4th of July. Not sure that will turn out, but I'll be sure to comment on it here.
But in the last post I mentioned that if you don't hear from me for a while, I might just be dead. Thought it would be good to point out I've just been busy.
The day I last posted marked the beginning of a short vacation in which I visited an old friend of mine. I just got back a few days ago. I had planned to post updates along the week that I was gone, but as it turns out, my friend has neither cable or internet. To top it off, my laptop chose that time to stop responding to my power adapter. Thankfully, my buddy's stepdaughter's computer was in the house and her power adapter was compatible with my laptop.
I didn't really get out to the gym much, really just to set up my locker (I am now renting a locker there) and go for a swim.
So there's not been much exercise, but what about the diet? Well, I brought some Weight Watcher's snacks with me for the vacation, so that I wouldn't have to worry about being hungry. Honestly, I didn't need them much. I didn't eat well, but while I was at my friend's I didn't indulge myself too much. Though we did go out to a buffet one evening, even then I didn't stuff myself too much.
However, at the end of my mini-vaca, I stopped at a place I've been dying to try - "Simply Fondue".
They have an extensive Martini selection, and they offer a four course meal starting with a salad, an appetizer that comes with a bowl of melted cheese and sauce, along with vegetables, fruit, and bread to dip in.
Then the main course consists of three meats of your choosing and a plate of vegetables. The fondue grill is used to heat a pot of oil that you cook the food in.
The dessert is peices of fruit, marshmallow and cake. And you can choose from 14 different chocalate sauces to dip the dessert in.
Obviously, this is pretty filling stuff.
Anyway, I don't know how far my weight went up this week yet, as I haven't been to Weight Watcher's, I'm going in a few hours.
I'll take my measurements as well, though I imagine there won't be much difference.
In conclusion, I haven't been to the gym for real in a week. No treadmill, etc. I can't let mysellf drop the exercise regimine. I have to get back on the ball.
Of course, part of the problem is that tomorrow marks the beginning of another mini vacation, this time I'll be spending the weekend plus change with some other friends of mine, for the 4th of July. Not sure that will turn out, but I'll be sure to comment on it here.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Updates and new features
A few changes going on around here.
For one thing, I'll be including my weight every week. Today I went to weight watcher's and got weighed. My official weight today is 528.6lbs.
I was 550 at one point, and I haven't managed to screw up enough to make all that weight back, but I still have a long way to go until I'm anywhere near healthy.
Yesterday I almost didn't work out. I've been penniless for about a month because of a snafu with my unemployment. I didn't get the money until today and yesterday my truck's gas tank was all but empty. So the night before, I asked my mother if she would fill up the tank. My folks are ok with helping out with the gas because of how much I burn going to my Dad's gym. (Not sure if I explained this, it's not his like he owns it, it's his company's gym.)
She needed to fill up in the morning so she said she would wake me up to come with her. She woke me up around 7. That was real pleasant; Because I'm such a loser, with no job et al, I normally sleep til about 1 in the afternoon.
She got me up at seven so I could help her put a new mat on the trampoline for my sister. (The mat is the part you jump on.) We had to disconnect all the rusty, stubborn springs and then reattach them to the new mat.
Mom had trouble once mat was almost done. At that point, the mat is really stretched, and holds on tight to the last springs. I did most of the work putting the mat back on. That was tougher than taking it off. You have to stretch out the spring, and hook it onto the metal dooohicky on the mat. Not to mention making sure they are spaced right. You can't do one after the other, it's like putting on a tire. If you mess up the spacing, you have to remove that spring and do it again.
When I was done my shoulders were seriously aching, like they were raw, like someone had hammered a pole through them, front to back.
I considered skipping the gym yesterday as a result of this, and decided to go to weight watcher's instead. As I was getting ready to go, I noticed Mom was heading somewhere as well. Turns out she was heading to the gym at the University I go to. I figured what the hell, and hitched a ride with her.
I've never been to the gym at my college. I've only gone one semester, and I never made the time to hit the gym. I have been inside, just to look around, and it looks nice, but I was in for a surprise.
The first problem I realized was that I didn't bring my mp3 player. No fucking way I'm exercising without my music. Yes, I know they play their music, and sometimes there's a good song, and sometimes you're listening to bullshit, and it's not loud enough to keep my mind occupied anyway. Mom has an iPod, but the screen doesn't work and it was repeating all Al Green songs. I like Al Green, but not over and over and over.
I decided I would figure it out, and we went inside. I flashed my card and she filled out a form. Since she's an alumni, she gets a nice discount. For me, it's free.
I realized quickly that this place is nothing like my Dad's gym. For one thing, at Dad's gym, the towels are complimentary. All of them - handtowels, washcloths and large towel for after your shower. At the University gym, you can rent a hand towel. That's it. Otherwise, you bring your own.
You gotta rent a lock too, or bring your own, or you ca n just leave it up to luck that you're szhit won't get stolen. The lockers aren't big enough for my bag, which is really a small suitcase. I know that sounds like a woman thing, but I not only keep my workout clothes in there, but my sneakers in the there and my swimming clothes and sandals for walking around the locker room and shower. I need some room. And this bag wasn't going to fit, and I wasn't leaving it out. Also, I had no towel with me and I wasn't going to work out and then not shower!
So, I met up with Mom and told her I wasn't going to work out. She wasn't happy about this, and we argued about it. She offered to let me use her towel, and she would shower when she got home. She offered to rent me a lock and a towel. Still no dice. I sat down and started fiddling with the iPod, I got it to change bands, I could get it to go on shuffle. It just kept repeating bands.
Mom found me again and offered to wait for me outside the locker room, and put my bag in her car while we worked out, then bring it back in again when we were done. (For the record, my mom is a saint!) That did it. Except for the iPod. She fiddled with it for a minutes, and managed to get it on shuffle, without a screen, even!
The worst part about that is when I got down to the locker room and started changing, I realized that in the pocket of my workout shorts, was my mp3 player.
The workout was ok. I was already a little sore, especially in my shoulders, but I grinned and bore it. I finished mine well before mom finished hers. My middle walk (the main one) broke 8 minutes, so things are pretty much back to normal. I just needed to hold back a little and not push it.
The equipment at this gym is different than Dad's, though. In between walks on the treadmill, at Dad's gym, I use a set of machines that use air pressure instead of weights. They didn't have that at the U(University) Gym and I really didn't know what to do in between sets. I just sat there until I was ready to hop on again. As a result my workout went even faster than normal.
I will say this though - the treadmills are better at the U Gym. At Dad's gym the treadmill's track is narrow, and my feet keep rubbing the sides, and threatening to rip up the hard plastic that borders the tread.
At the U Gym, the track is wide, nice and wide, the whole machine is, and my thighs never bump into the side, a problem I have at Dad's gym, as it causes my mp3 player to skip to the next song.
So there was an upside. The locker room was the biggest downside. To begin with, it stunk. At Dad's gym, they go out of their way to make it seem like any other room, with a normal smell. At the U Gym, I felt like I was back in High School again.
I went into the shower and found that they had a handicap shower, which is good. I can sit down for my shower. But no soap. And I didn't bring any. What a bitch!
So I just washed real good with water, and laid a little heavy on the Axe deoderant. As I left though, something caught my eye in the shower area. All the shower spots had soap dispensers, like the ones by the sink in public restrooms, all of them, except the handicap one!
I mentioned it at the front desk, I assume that will be remedied soon.
Not a bad deal, but I was truly sore last night, and more than happy to go to bed around midnight.
I woke up at 8AM today feeling pretty good. I checked my account online, and the money has shown! But only half of it. But half is something. It allows me a haircut, shopping, etc.
It has gone to a lot of good use today. And there's still some left.
I talked to unemployment. They don't know why the other half didn't go through, they are going to try and push it through.
I went to Weight Watchers this morning. The last time I went was last month and I've lost 5 pounds since then. (My official weight, again being 528.6 lbs.)
I also bought a tape measure. That's the other feature. Periodically, maybe every week, I will measure my waist. Maybe other parts too! (Don't be dirty, I meant like my legs and my chest.)
It was tough finding the right tape measure. mostly they only came in sewing kits and the longest one was only 5 feet long. (Riiiight...ONLY 5 FEET!) But I found one that was sold alone, that was 10 feet long, and I got that. Standing up, my waist is 69 inches around. Tha t's about 5 feet, 9 inches. Around. Interestingly enough, I'm only 6ft tall, which means I'm only about 3 inches taller than I am round. Pretty fucking sad. But the whole point is to see the numbers go down, right?
Or maybe for you folks out there, see them go up. Until one day, you just don't hear from me anymore, because I'm dead.
My family gets on my case all the time about smoking. I used to smoke cigarettes, now I smoke cigars. They get upset about my drinking too! I tell them, do you really think smoking can kill me? Drinking? They have my weight to contend with, and my weight's kicking the shit out of them. I'll die from my weight LONG BEFORE drinking or smoking!
For one thing, I'll be including my weight every week. Today I went to weight watcher's and got weighed. My official weight today is 528.6lbs.
I was 550 at one point, and I haven't managed to screw up enough to make all that weight back, but I still have a long way to go until I'm anywhere near healthy.
Yesterday I almost didn't work out. I've been penniless for about a month because of a snafu with my unemployment. I didn't get the money until today and yesterday my truck's gas tank was all but empty. So the night before, I asked my mother if she would fill up the tank. My folks are ok with helping out with the gas because of how much I burn going to my Dad's gym. (Not sure if I explained this, it's not his like he owns it, it's his company's gym.)
She needed to fill up in the morning so she said she would wake me up to come with her. She woke me up around 7. That was real pleasant; Because I'm such a loser, with no job et al, I normally sleep til about 1 in the afternoon.
She got me up at seven so I could help her put a new mat on the trampoline for my sister. (The mat is the part you jump on.) We had to disconnect all the rusty, stubborn springs and then reattach them to the new mat.
Mom had trouble once mat was almost done. At that point, the mat is really stretched, and holds on tight to the last springs. I did most of the work putting the mat back on. That was tougher than taking it off. You have to stretch out the spring, and hook it onto the metal dooohicky on the mat. Not to mention making sure they are spaced right. You can't do one after the other, it's like putting on a tire. If you mess up the spacing, you have to remove that spring and do it again.
When I was done my shoulders were seriously aching, like they were raw, like someone had hammered a pole through them, front to back.
I considered skipping the gym yesterday as a result of this, and decided to go to weight watcher's instead. As I was getting ready to go, I noticed Mom was heading somewhere as well. Turns out she was heading to the gym at the University I go to. I figured what the hell, and hitched a ride with her.
I've never been to the gym at my college. I've only gone one semester, and I never made the time to hit the gym. I have been inside, just to look around, and it looks nice, but I was in for a surprise.
The first problem I realized was that I didn't bring my mp3 player. No fucking way I'm exercising without my music. Yes, I know they play their music, and sometimes there's a good song, and sometimes you're listening to bullshit, and it's not loud enough to keep my mind occupied anyway. Mom has an iPod, but the screen doesn't work and it was repeating all Al Green songs. I like Al Green, but not over and over and over.
I decided I would figure it out, and we went inside. I flashed my card and she filled out a form. Since she's an alumni, she gets a nice discount. For me, it's free.
I realized quickly that this place is nothing like my Dad's gym. For one thing, at Dad's gym, the towels are complimentary. All of them - handtowels, washcloths and large towel for after your shower. At the University gym, you can rent a hand towel. That's it. Otherwise, you bring your own.
You gotta rent a lock too, or bring your own, or you ca n just leave it up to luck that you're szhit won't get stolen. The lockers aren't big enough for my bag, which is really a small suitcase. I know that sounds like a woman thing, but I not only keep my workout clothes in there, but my sneakers in the there and my swimming clothes and sandals for walking around the locker room and shower. I need some room. And this bag wasn't going to fit, and I wasn't leaving it out. Also, I had no towel with me and I wasn't going to work out and then not shower!
So, I met up with Mom and told her I wasn't going to work out. She wasn't happy about this, and we argued about it. She offered to let me use her towel, and she would shower when she got home. She offered to rent me a lock and a towel. Still no dice. I sat down and started fiddling with the iPod, I got it to change bands, I could get it to go on shuffle. It just kept repeating bands.
Mom found me again and offered to wait for me outside the locker room, and put my bag in her car while we worked out, then bring it back in again when we were done. (For the record, my mom is a saint!) That did it. Except for the iPod. She fiddled with it for a minutes, and managed to get it on shuffle, without a screen, even!
The worst part about that is when I got down to the locker room and started changing, I realized that in the pocket of my workout shorts, was my mp3 player.
The workout was ok. I was already a little sore, especially in my shoulders, but I grinned and bore it. I finished mine well before mom finished hers. My middle walk (the main one) broke 8 minutes, so things are pretty much back to normal. I just needed to hold back a little and not push it.
The equipment at this gym is different than Dad's, though. In between walks on the treadmill, at Dad's gym, I use a set of machines that use air pressure instead of weights. They didn't have that at the U(University) Gym and I really didn't know what to do in between sets. I just sat there until I was ready to hop on again. As a result my workout went even faster than normal.
I will say this though - the treadmills are better at the U Gym. At Dad's gym the treadmill's track is narrow, and my feet keep rubbing the sides, and threatening to rip up the hard plastic that borders the tread.
At the U Gym, the track is wide, nice and wide, the whole machine is, and my thighs never bump into the side, a problem I have at Dad's gym, as it causes my mp3 player to skip to the next song.
So there was an upside. The locker room was the biggest downside. To begin with, it stunk. At Dad's gym, they go out of their way to make it seem like any other room, with a normal smell. At the U Gym, I felt like I was back in High School again.
I went into the shower and found that they had a handicap shower, which is good. I can sit down for my shower. But no soap. And I didn't bring any. What a bitch!
So I just washed real good with water, and laid a little heavy on the Axe deoderant. As I left though, something caught my eye in the shower area. All the shower spots had soap dispensers, like the ones by the sink in public restrooms, all of them, except the handicap one!
I mentioned it at the front desk, I assume that will be remedied soon.
Not a bad deal, but I was truly sore last night, and more than happy to go to bed around midnight.
I woke up at 8AM today feeling pretty good. I checked my account online, and the money has shown! But only half of it. But half is something. It allows me a haircut, shopping, etc.
It has gone to a lot of good use today. And there's still some left.
I talked to unemployment. They don't know why the other half didn't go through, they are going to try and push it through.
I went to Weight Watchers this morning. The last time I went was last month and I've lost 5 pounds since then. (My official weight, again being 528.6 lbs.)
I also bought a tape measure. That's the other feature. Periodically, maybe every week, I will measure my waist. Maybe other parts too! (Don't be dirty, I meant like my legs and my chest.)
It was tough finding the right tape measure. mostly they only came in sewing kits and the longest one was only 5 feet long. (Riiiight...ONLY 5 FEET!) But I found one that was sold alone, that was 10 feet long, and I got that. Standing up, my waist is 69 inches around. Tha t's about 5 feet, 9 inches. Around. Interestingly enough, I'm only 6ft tall, which means I'm only about 3 inches taller than I am round. Pretty fucking sad. But the whole point is to see the numbers go down, right?
Or maybe for you folks out there, see them go up. Until one day, you just don't hear from me anymore, because I'm dead.
My family gets on my case all the time about smoking. I used to smoke cigarettes, now I smoke cigars. They get upset about my drinking too! I tell them, do you really think smoking can kill me? Drinking? They have my weight to contend with, and my weight's kicking the shit out of them. I'll die from my weight LONG BEFORE drinking or smoking!
Monday, June 22, 2009
So I made it back to the gym today. I must say, not one of my red letter days. On the up side, the hot tub was working (finallly!), on the down side, it was rather busy upstairs and when I got on the treadmill for my main walk I only did 6 minutes. Last time I did something like 7 and a half, but this time I only did 6. In the park the other day I did over 8 minutes! So why only six this time!?!?
I'll chalk it up to how hard I pushed myself. I was dying to get off at 5 and it really hurt to go the extra minute.
I started pushing the speed and the walking on the treadmill without holding on, which makes me walk faster.
So I'm not too concerned, I'm going back Wednesday and I'm going to take it easy; not too easy, just not going over level 2, and not even getting there till I'm a few minutes away from stopping.
I want to get back over level 8.
Making matters worse today, there were just too many people there for my cooldown, which is usually another 5 minutes on the treadmill. But those were all taken up, so I did a lap on the track around the gym.
I also had gotten there early enough to take part in the aquarobics class. I'm going to try and make an effort to be even earlier, so that I can be in the pool before the class starts.
I found out the locker rental will be 35 dollars a month. They have a 25 dollar one that is smaller (much) but I need the room, I'll be keeping my workout clothes and my swimming clothes, along with sneakers and sandals and such in there.
I also need to get to Weight Watchers. I wanted to last week but I didn't. So I'm going tomorrow. Again, I have to work everything into a schedule.
I'll chalk it up to how hard I pushed myself. I was dying to get off at 5 and it really hurt to go the extra minute.
I started pushing the speed and the walking on the treadmill without holding on, which makes me walk faster.
So I'm not too concerned, I'm going back Wednesday and I'm going to take it easy; not too easy, just not going over level 2, and not even getting there till I'm a few minutes away from stopping.
I want to get back over level 8.
Making matters worse today, there were just too many people there for my cooldown, which is usually another 5 minutes on the treadmill. But those were all taken up, so I did a lap on the track around the gym.
I also had gotten there early enough to take part in the aquarobics class. I'm going to try and make an effort to be even earlier, so that I can be in the pool before the class starts.
I found out the locker rental will be 35 dollars a month. They have a 25 dollar one that is smaller (much) but I need the room, I'll be keeping my workout clothes and my swimming clothes, along with sneakers and sandals and such in there.
I also need to get to Weight Watchers. I wanted to last week but I didn't. So I'm going tomorrow. Again, I have to work everything into a schedule.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Taking the show on the road
I finally emptied the back of my truck at the dump today. When I look in the rear-view mirror, I can actually see what's behind my truck!
Part of me wanted to go to the gym and work out, but it was a little too late. The pool closes at 5PM on Saturdays and it was around 4PM. So, I decided to try walking in the park. I wasn't sure about it. I don't like treadmills much, but on the treadmill, I can hold on the the bar. I can put some weight on the bars if I need to. Walking, your just walking.
So I headed down to the park. I hadn't really thought it through. I didn't think about taking a warm up walk, or a cool down. I just went walking. I didn't even time it, but I know it was an eight minute walk from the songs I listened to (8 minutes and some change). That's not bad. Better than my time previously (7 minutes). I would have walked again but the rain started really coming down.
Not sure if I'm going to the gym tomorrow. I know I won't be able to get in the pool, and I don't know if they fixed the hot tub yet.
I'll be there on Monday for sure.
Part of me wanted to go to the gym and work out, but it was a little too late. The pool closes at 5PM on Saturdays and it was around 4PM. So, I decided to try walking in the park. I wasn't sure about it. I don't like treadmills much, but on the treadmill, I can hold on the the bar. I can put some weight on the bars if I need to. Walking, your just walking.
So I headed down to the park. I hadn't really thought it through. I didn't think about taking a warm up walk, or a cool down. I just went walking. I didn't even time it, but I know it was an eight minute walk from the songs I listened to (8 minutes and some change). That's not bad. Better than my time previously (7 minutes). I would have walked again but the rain started really coming down.
Not sure if I'm going to the gym tomorrow. I know I won't be able to get in the pool, and I don't know if they fixed the hot tub yet.
I'll be there on Monday for sure.
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